Posted on by castleberryhearts

Texas Heart – Part 27 {No Empty Words}

I sat in the passenger seat of my car as Grant drove down the long oyster shell road that led to his dad’s memorial marker in the Beaufort National Cemetery.

It was August 21st, the day before our wedding, and Grant had planned a special memorial service in honor of his father. It was the first time all of his family had been back in Beaufort since the first memorial service that was given for his dad the year after his plane crash.
Grant had just flown in from Japan the day before. 
The two months of summer between our trip to Alaska and our wedding had been really busy for me.
It had been a stressful and wonderful summer all at the same time. It was stressful when I thought about all that needed to be done in preparation for our wedding and my new life with Grant, but wonderful as I saw God work out all the details for everything.
I felt overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity that so many people from our church showed my family. There was no way to properly thank everyone who offered to help.
From the flowers, the food, the music, the invitations, the photography, the cake, and even down to the young people who offered to be servers at our reception, the kindness of our friends was more than we could have imagined. And I could go on and on.
I knew that our wedding was going to be wonderful because of all the people who were giving of their time and talents.
And I knew that I didn’t deserve any of it.
But the beauty of all those things could not compare with the excitement I felt over the vows that Grant and I were about to make to one another.
I have always felt that the aesthetic adornments of a wedding find their true beauty when they are not ends in themselves, but when they are reflections of a deeper beauty.
And that deeper beauty was the covenant that Grant and I were about to make before God. It was the answered prayers of our parents. It was our thankfulness to God that He had been preparing our hearts for one another long before we ever knew it. It was a day to acknowledgement His perfect gift of giving us each other, so that we could serve Him together.
I so wanted our friends and family who attended our wedding to sense that deeper beauty. I wanted them to feel God’s presence at our ceremony. And Grant and I both wanted every aspect of our wedding day to point to Christ – the One who had saved us and given us a purpose for living.
Because of that, Grant and I put a lot of thought into planning our ceremony.
One thing that we are extremely thankful for is that both sets of our parents have marriages that reflect Christ and that they have been faithful to the vows that they made on their wedding day (including Grant’s dad, Kelly, and his father now, Preston).
After much thought, Grant and I chose to use the same vows that my mom and dad had written for their ceremony when they got married in 1980.
We also chose two “special music” songs for our ceremony. The first song was one that Grant and I had both grown up loving. It was Keith Green’s “Make My Life a Prayer to You.”  When I was a freshman in college, I had written out the lyrics to this song as a prayer in the front cover of my Bible.
When Grant and I were dating, he told me that he used to listen to that same song over and over again in high school. The song became even more special to us when we realized that God had used it in both of our lives separately.
We also chose a song that was been sung at my parent’s wedding called, “I Could Never Promise You.” The song speaks of how we can never love one another in marriage the way that we should without Christ’s strength.
We were also including something in the ceremony that was important to us in another way.
It was Grant’s father’s wedding band. It was the band that his mom, Susan, put on Kelly’s finger on their wedding day in 1983 when they promised to love and be faithful to one another until death parted them.
When they got married, I know neither of them ever imagined that death would visit their marriage so soon. But it did.
But even in three short years of marriage, Kelly and Susan demonstrated a life of faithfulness to one another and to Christ.
I knew Grant was honored and excited to wear his dad’s wedding band, even now, 23 years after his death.
Grant and I had already engraved our wedding date next to his parents on the inside of the ring.
It was a reminder to both of us that we were to love one another until death separated us.
I looked over at Grant as we were nearing the end of the oyster shell road that led to his father’s memorial marker.
I could see that the cars of most of our family members were already parked under the giant live oaks that grow throughout the cemetery.
Grant parked the car. We sat there for a moment.
“Are you okay?” I asked Grant.
“Yeah, I’m fine. This is just a big day for me.”
Grant was serious and I could tell he was holding back emotion.
“GraceAnna, I know God took my dad to heaven for a reason, but sometimes it’s hard. I just wish he could be here.”
Grant and I both smiled, knowing that we wouldn’t be in the cemetery if his dad were alive, but I knew what he meant. He wished his dad could be there for our wedding.
Of course, Grant doesn’t mean that he would want to change anything about his family life now. He has the best family in the world, but it doesn’t mean that he somehow wishes that his dad could be here.
“Grant, your dad would be so proud of you. I know you are going to honor him today in such a special way. And in doing so, you will honor Christ. I’m praying for you.”
“Thanks, GraceAnna.” Grant took a deep breath and opened the car door.
To be continued . . .
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Texas Heart Part 26 {The Last Good-bye}

Grant and I stood in the giant airplane hanger on Elmandorf Air Force Base in Alaska. Grant was about to board a C-130 with his marines and fly to Fairbanks to conduct another Marine Corps exercise.
His time in Anchorage was over, and so was our time together. My flight was leaving Anchorage later that evening.
As we stood in the hanger, it was difficult to hear each other over the loud roar of the airplane engines.
I looked at Grant as he stood there in his camouflage and combat boots. I could tell by his serious expression on his face that his mind was already engaged on the work he had ahead of him. That was something that I would understand more fully later – how my Marine husband would say good-bye to me long before he actually left. Whether it was just for a few days or a few months, he would get focused on the work ahead of him and couldn’t relax until it was over.
 I felt a lump form in my throat as we stood there. I hated saying good-bye.
The next time I would see Grant would be at our wedding in two months. After our wedding, I knew my life would be so different. I would no longer be a single woman under my dad’s protection. I would be a Marine Officer’s wife; and in the future, a seminary student’s wife, and eventually a Pastor’s wife. I didn’t know where that would take us, or the challenges that it would bring. I just knew everything was about to change.
Planning and looking ahead to our future was something that we had talked a lot about the past week we had been together in Alaska. 
Our first year of marriage was going to be far from typical. After we got married and went on our honeymoon, Grant would immediately be starting a very intense training school in Yuma, Arizona.
Normally, husbands don’t bring their wives to this school because the hours that they work are so long, and it’s only 2 1/2 months long. But because we would be newly married and establishing ourselves as a married couple, Grant wanted to bring me with him, and I wanted to go.
He had already found a small one-bedroom apartment just a few minutes from base. After our time in Yuma, we would fly straight to Japan. We would be there for a few months before Grant had to leave on a deployment. I would most likely fly back to the states while he was away.
Needless to say, our first year of marriage was going to include a ton of traveling. I knew that living out of a suitcase wasn’t going to be easy. I couldn’t deny that it scared me a little bit to know that there were so many “unknowns” about our future in the Marine Corps.
But one thing I did know was that the man that stood before me loved me with all his heart and was committed to providing for me for the rest of my life.
After all, that’s what he had told me in his third or fourth letter to me after we had started dating. After just a few months, Grant had told me that he wanted to marry me, provide for me, raise a family with me, do ministry with me, and take care of me for as long as God gave me breath on this earth.
And when I read those words in that letter that day, I knew he meant every single one of them.
“GraceAnna, I hate saying good-bye to you.” Grant spoke loudly so that I could hear him over the engine noise. “Listen, don’t be sad because next time I see you, we won’t have to say good-bye anymore because you are going to become my wife!”
Grant leaned close to me and whispered, “Sure wish I could kiss you right now.” We had decided months before to wait until our wedding day to share our first kiss.
So instead Grant squeezed my hands, looked at me, and said, “Babe, I’ve got to go.”
I watched as he slowly backed away, still facing me, then turned and started jogging towards the C-130 where the other Marine were waiting.
Our time in Alaska together had been so good for us. In fact, now the number of days we had spent together was up to over twenty total.
Grant was with the other marines now and I tried to distinguish him amidst the camouflage.
Then I saw him raise his hand to get my attention. He flashed one last smile at me before boarding the plane.
As I got in the car, I watched as the grey C-130 made it’s way down the runway. I prayed that God would bring Grant safely back to South Carolina in August.
I knew I couldn’t bare life without him.
To be continued…

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A Wake Up

“GraceAnna, wake up!” Grant’s words seemed faint and far off. I opened my eyes for a moment to see him standing over me trying to wake me up. It was early. And in my mind, too early to be getting up.

AudreyKate was still asleep, which meant I should still be asleep.

A few minutes later I heard his voice again. “GraceAnna, I just put on a pot of coffee, get up!”

This time I sat up in bed and watched Grant walk out of the bedroom. I quickly got dressed and came downstairs for a cup of coffee.


“I thought we could spend some time together in the Word on the beach before the day gets going.” Grant explained.

We had discussed this plan the night before. The plan had actually included getting up to watch the sunrise. The sun had already been up for an hour by the time Grant woke me up. We had both missed that.

I always want to get up early to spend time with my husband, but the getting up part is always difficult for me. Especially on mornings when AudreyKate has had a couple middle-of-the-night feedings.

I heard AudreyKate wake up while we sipped our coffee. We put her in the covered stroller, grabbed our Bibles and headed out to the beach.

It was mainly empty, except for a few early morning runners who were out. Like always, it was beautiful. The hues on the beach always seem to be more vibrant in the morning. We plopped down in the foldable chairs we brought with us and started reading.

My time in God’s Word was so refreshing. And I realized as I sat out there that I needed it so much more than I needed sleep.

I looked over at Grant. He was engrossed in a book called, “Heroes” by Iain Murray that I gave him for Father’s Day.

“Hey,” I said. “Thanks for waking me up.”

“But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.” – Heb. 3:13



 

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Texas Heart Part 25 {Who Says You Can’t Go Home?}

“Grant!” I whispered loudly through the tent flap.

We were camping in Seward, Alaska with friends of family and it was sometime in the middle of the night.  I had to use the bathroom and the bathroom buildings were about a quarter of a mile down the road. I was afraid to walk there alone.

“Grant, I need to go to the bathroom!” I whispered again. Please, oh please wake up! I thought to myself.

I heard him stir and mumble something.

I waited in the semi-darkness a few more moments and then realized Grant wasn’t waking up. Since we weren’t married, I didn’t feel comfortable going into his tent and waking him up in the middle of the night.

I sighed and looked down the gravel road where the bathroom was located. I knew I couldn’t wait until morning. I had to go.

I worked up my courage and started walking. Thankfully, since it was summer in Alaska, it was still pretty light.

I saw a few campfires glowing in the distance as I approached the bathrooms. I went as quickly as possible and half-ran back towards our tents, looking around for any sign of bears.

I did it! I did it! I chanted to myself.

As I rounded the last corner before our tents, I saw the dog. He was standing in the middle of the road – the road that I needed to walk down to get back to our campsite.

I froze in fear.

Ever since I was a little girl I have been afraid of dogs. I like friendly dogs once I get to know them, but whenever I see a dog I don’t know, I always jump with a twinge of fear.

When I was around seven or eight years old, my brothers and I used to spend a lot of time on a plantation near our home that some friends of ours live on.

There were lots of dogs on the plantation. Whenever they would come near and bark, I would get so scared that our babysitter, Sarah, would let me ride on her back.

It probably didn’t help that around that same time I watched a Little House on the Prairie episode where a pack of wild dogs ran rampant all over the small prairie town, hurting people and killing animals.

So, that night in Alaska, I flinched and stood still and stared at the dog that most certainly was wild and was preparing to attack.

Then my fears came true. He growled at me.

Oh no! Lord, please save me! I prayed.

I could already see the headlines: South Carolina girl mauled to death by a wild dog at Alaskan campground. 

It would be the type of thing where people would read it and say, “What was that girl doing out there anyway? She should know better than to be alone in the Alaskan wilderness.”

Then suddenly, the dog stopped growling and started wagging his tail at something around the bend that I couldn’t see.

Then I heard a voice say, “Hey boy” to the wild dog.

I let out a sigh as I waited for the dog’s owner to round the bend. I guess he’s not wild after all.

Then I saw the cowboy boots.

Grant smiled a sleepy smile at me as he rounded the corner.

The dog quietly trotted away.

He must have realized that he no longer had easy prey.

My hero! I almost exclaimed aloud.

“GraceAnna, what are you doing out here? You shouldn’t have come out here alone!”

“Oh, I know that now.” I said as I ran up to him and grabbed his hand.

Grant smiled again. “It took me a few minutes to realize that I wasn’t dreaming when you tried to wake me up.”


“I’m just so glad you woke up and saved me from that awful dog!” 


“That old mutt?” Grant asked smiling.


“Grant!”


Grant smiled as he squeezed my hand and we approached the campsite.


“GraceAnna, get some rest. It’s still a few hours until morning.”


 “And hey,” Grant added as I started to climb back into the tent.

 I turned and looked back at him.

“You’re doing pretty good out here. You’ve almost made it through the night.” He said with a wink.

I zipped up my sleeping bag and closed my eyes. I hoped that I wouldn’t have to use the bathroom again before morning.

 I also hoped that I was just imagining that I felt sick.

————————————-

I sat in the truck half-crying. It was the next morning and it was rainy and cold.

“GraceAnna, I’m taking you back to Anchorage and that’s that.” Grant said matter-of-factly.

“But Grant it will ruin the trip and everyone will think I’m leaving because I’m a big baby”

“It doesn’t matter what people think, GraceAnna. You are running a fever and you don’t need to stay another night outside.”

I knew Grant was right,  but I felt like I was chickening out of the camping trip.

I had so wanted to be brave and adventurous and stay out there the whole weekend like everyone else.

I had wanted to do something I’d never done before.

But I had woken up that morning feeling worse and running a fever.

I couldn’t deny it, I was miserable. And now it was raining and everything was wet.

“I’m going to talk to everyone and let them know I have to take you back, okay? They will understand.”

Grant got out of the truck and explained the situation to the families we were camping with.

They were so gracious. And no one said anything about me being a baby. At least that I could hear.

As we were heading to the truck to leave, Grant said, “Wait!” 

“What?” I asked.

“Let’s go back into your tent. I want to take a picture of something.”

I crawled back in the tent.

“Now sit right in front of your pallet. Yes, right there.” Grant said as I stooped over where I had slept the night before.

Grant snapped a picture. “Yep, just wanted to take this shot for proof that you slept outside.”

“Thanks, Grant. That will be a wonderful photo.” I said with a hint of sarcasm.

A few minutes later we were heading back to Anchorage in the warm truck.

I was already starting to feel better.

“Now GraceAnna, we are going to get you well.” Grant said matter-of-factly. “I’m going to feed you a good meal, you are going to get some good sleep, and we are going to kill this fever!”

 I stared out the window as long as I could at the beautiful Alaskan mountains, but before I knew it, the thought of a warm bed that night, plus the effects of the tylenol lulled me to sleep.

“GraceAnna, wake up!” Grant’s voice awakened me.

I sat up. We were in an IHOP parking lot.

“Time for a good meal.” Grant explained.

Once inside, I stared at the menu. “I don’t really know what to get.” I said. “I never eat here.”

“You never eat here? You are really missing out! I’ll order for you.” Grant placed the order with the waitress and before I knew it there were pancakes, bacon, eggs, and hash-browns in front of me.

“Eat it all.” Grant told me.

I did.

When we left, I was already feeling so much better.

“See, GraceAnna, I know you. You were just run-down from your trip out here, the time-change, and the lack of sleep. Now let’s get you to bed and you’ll be as good as gold.“

Grant dropped me off at the family’s house that I was staying at.

“Get some sleep,” he said as he let me go inside.

The house was empty and we were alone.

But Grant said good-night.

I climbed in bed and and drifted off to sleep thinking about how thankful I was that I had a man who took care of me. He was already protecting and providing for me.

He got me out of the Alaskan wilderness, fed me his version of a good meal, and now I was in a warm bed instead of camping in the wet and cold.

And even though he could have taken advantage of the opportunity to be alone with me, he didn’t.

Lord, thank you for Grant Castleberry, was the last thing I thought before falling asleep.

——————————

to be continued…

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His Uniform

It’s dark outside, but I can see Grant’s shadow in our bedroom as he buttons his Marine Corps camouflage uniform. It’s 3am. He kisses me good-bye and I watch him walk out the door. Before I drift back to sleep, I think about how much I don’t like his uniform.

————–

Gross! I say to myself as I pull Grant’s camouflage out of the dirty hamper and transfer it as quickly as possible to the washer. I think about the fact that he has probably run more miles wearing this uniform in two days than I’ll probably run all week.

————–

The dryer beeps. I haven’t seen Grant in three days. I pull one of his camouflage uniforms out of the dryer and hold it close. I feel the cool metal of his Lt bars on my cheek and remember the time when I watched him walk away from me in this uniform. We had only been married a few months when he left on a deployment. I will never forget the moment when we had to say good-bye. I waved through my blur of tears until I couldn’t see him any longer. I think about how happy I am that tonight he is coming home.

————–

I hear the car door slam. I look out the kitchen window and see Grant’s huge smile under his camouflage cover as he walks up to the back door. I love camouflage. 

————-

I search high and low for Grant’s bald eagle and globe pin that goes on his dress blues. I cannot believe I lost it. I finally check at the cleaners and I find it in the parking lot. It’s smashed and cracked and now I’ll have to get a new one fast. I let out a frustrated sigh.

————–

It won’t be long before my husband won’t be wearing his uniform anymore. I won’t have to watch him walk out the door in the middle of the night. I won’t be washing his forest green and desert storm camis anymore. I won’t have to say good-bye through tears and watch him leave for months at a time.
But that uniform that I have come to often disdain, I will miss.

I’ll miss it because my heart won’t be able to skip a beat when I see a mess of camouflage walk in the back door.

And when the Colors play,  I won’t get to see him standing tall in his dress blues.

But one thing for sure, uniform or not, he will always be standing tall.

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Man of Honor

I can still remember that morning pretty clearly.

I was riding with my dad in our family’s old green station wagon. It was just the two of us and we had just finished a daddy/daughter breakfast date at McDonald’s. I had ordered the sausage biscuit and my dad ordered the hotcakes like always.

I was five or six years old.

On our way to the church office after breakfast we sang songs like, “Old MacDonald” and “This is the Day” together. I loved to sing.

After singing, I remember my dad explaining to me why Jesus died on the cross. He told me that Jesus died because I was a sinner and my sin deserved to be punished.

He told me that Jesus took my “spanking” by dying for me.

It wasn’t the first time that my dad had told me about Jesus. From as early as I can remember my parents were talking to me about God.

All I knew was that I wanted to know Jesus. I wanted Him to be my friend. My dad told me that Jesus wanted to be my friend too and that’s why He came to earth and died.

All I had to do was believe in Jesus.

I did.

I don’t know why that particular memory of us driving to the church office is seared in my mind.  Maybe it’s because we ate at McDonald’s, maybe it’s because we were singing, but I think it’s probably because God was working in my heart through the words of my dad.

Driving with my dad to the church office was something that my brothers and I did a lot since we were the pastor’s kids.

I never resented being a pastor’s kid. I embraced it.

But it wasn’t always easy. Sometimes it was really hard.

I remember one day getting really upset because someone said something mean about my dad. I was hurt and I wanted to defend him.

I went to my dad and told them what they had said and I fully expected him to get upset, but he didn’t.

He didn’t even say anything mean about the person who said it. Instead he said something nice.

I was so surprised. “Dad, how can you keep on going when people say stuff like that?” I asked. I knew that if someone said something like that about me, I would just quit.

I’ll never forget my dad’s answer. He said, “GraceAnna, if I were in ministry simply to please people, I would have quit a long time ago. I’m in ministry to please God.”

His response shifted my perspective off of others and onto Christ.

I let my frustration go, and instead looked to Christ.

The word “honor” is not a word that I use very often. But when I think of my dad, I think of this word.

To honor someone is to go beyond respect and to bend over backwards to show respect for other people.

My dad showed me what the word honor meant that day. And he showed it to me so many more times, and he still shows me what it means today.

I’m thankful for my dad on this father’s day for so many things. But when I think of what I’m thankful for most, it’s that He has always pointed me to Christ.

And he has sought to live His life so that others would see Christ.

Thank you dad for introducing me to my perfect Heavenly Father.

I love you. Happy Father’s Day.

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Texas Heart Part 24 {Starry Skies}

Note: {I wasn’t planning on going into more details of our Alaska trip because I am trying to finish Texas Heart 🙂 But Grant insisted that I include this. So, here’s part 24.}


————————–


“Do you like camping?” Grant asked with a half-smile on his face.

We were still in Alaska, and it was approaching the last few days of my visit.

“Well . . .” I began, trying to think of how to explain my feelings on this topic in a way that wouldn’t cause Grant to immediately write me off as a prissy, girly-girl.  

“I like camping in theory. . .” I continued, trying not to smile as Grant’s half-smile turned ear-to-ear.
“No, it’s not what you think!” I tried to clarify.  “I love being outdoors!” I knew it would be difficult to explain myself now. Great! I thought. What if long hikes into the wilderness and sleeping under the starry skies is something he’s always dreamed of doing with his future wife? 
“Grant, it’s not the being outside part that I have a problem with, just the sleeping outside part.” I wanted him to understand the huge difference there.

“Oh, I see,” Grant replied in a playful tone as if he was enjoying how much explanation was going into answering his question.
“Grant, it’s not that I haven’t tried to camp. I really have!” I was pleading with him now.

Now Grant had such a huge smile on his face that he was beginning to make me laugh.

I wasn’t lying about the trying part. There were quite a few nights growing up when my brothers would set up a tent in our wooded backyard to sleep outside. I would hang out in the tent until it was time to go to sleep. . .then I’d start to get scared.
I would peer out the screen flap and watch as my parents turned out the lights in the house as they went to bed.

It was so dark outside! 


I was determined to stay in the tent. We had brought games and snacks outside – all the things that make a campout fun. 
But. . .my heart was longing to go inside into the warm and safe house.
One night, I tried really hard to go to sleep in my sleeping bag when I heard a scratching noise on the side of the tent.


Scratch, scratch, scratch.

I could see the claw impressions on the thin tent lining. Any moment the terrible creature outside would most likely shred open the whole side of the tent.

After a few minutes of trembling in my sleeping bag and praying for God to make it go away, I finally couldn’t take it anymore. I unzipped the tent flap and ran as fast as I could to the house without looking back to see what creature was most assuredly chasing me. 
At the time, it never crossed my mind that the scratching was probably one of our cats.
I ran upstairs and collapsed on my wonderful, beloved bed. My bed that was right next to my parents’ room and where there were no creepy-crawly bugs or wild animals.
Ahh, safe at last!


I started to tell Grant about my failed childhood attempts at camping, but I could see that I was getting nowhere.

“Okay, okay. . .” I finally decided to be honest with Grant and with myself, “Camping is not my thing.”


“Uh oh,” Grant said, still smiling. “Well, we are going camping this weekend.”


“Oh, okay.” I said slowly, waiting for Grant to explain.

Grant went on to tell me that the family I was staying with had previously planned a camping trip for this particular weekend. There was no reason for their plans to change since Grant and I had crashed them. And since Grant and I weren’t married yet, it would be inappropriate for me to stay behind at their house alone with Grant visiting every day. The best solution was for us to join them. They had been so gracious to invite us.

“It will be fine.” I quickly responded. “I’m sure I’ll have a great time.  I know I can do it.”

Grant raised his eyebrow and looked at me.

“Grant it will be great.” I was determined that this time, there would be no chickening out. I would stay the night in a tent because well, there would be no Broggi house to run inside to. We would be in the real wilderness.

———————————–

We loaded up the truck with all of the camping supplies needed for the weekend. I kept telling myself constantly that I could do it and that it would be a ton of fun.

But I couldn’t ignore the fact that I didn’t feel well. I felt like I might be running a fever, but I didn’t want to say anything to Grant or to the family because I was afraid it would look like I was being a baby.

“GraceAnna, are you alright?” Grant asked as he noticed me leaning my head against the truck seat as we pulled out of the drive.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine, just a little tired.” I was hoping that was all that it was.

We started the three or so hour drive to Seward, the small fishing town that we would camp right outside of. It was evening, but it was still light, because it didn’t get dark this time of year.

Once we got out of Anchorage, the drive was breathtaking. We saw waterfalls flowing down the sides of mountains and a convocation of bald headed eagles sitting on a water bank.

I was enjoying every moment of our trip. I had never seen such wilderness beauty before. God’s creation was breathtaking and I forgot all about not feeling well.

We rounded one bend and I shouted, “Look, Grant a bear!!!”

Sure enough, there was a bear climbing up the side of a rock in the distance.

I leaned my head against the head rest again. There was no denying it, I wasn’t feeling well. But I still didn’t want to tell Grant.

“Grant, I’m just going to rest for a little while.”

“That’s fine, GraceAnna. I’m just going to listen to a sermon.” Grant said as he hooked up his ipod in the small truck the two of us were driving in.

I didn’t want to sleep, I wanted to look at the beautiful scenery outside my window, but I just couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer.

I closed my eyes and tried not to think of the bear we had just spotted on the cliff.

——————————

to be continued…

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Hymns for a Kid’s Heart

My mom used to rock my brothers and me to sleep every night singing hymns. My Grandma did too. I have lots of verses of hymns memorized that I sing to AudreyKate every night. I wish I knew more.

A couple years ago I picked up a book called, “Hymns for a Kid’s Heart” from my church bookstore in N.C. I thought I would save it for my kids one day.

However, I pulled it out yesterday because my nephews spent the night. We used it for our morning devotions. Yesterday we learned about Martin Luther and the hymn he wrote, “A Mighty Fortress is our God.” Today we read about Reginald Heber and the hymn he wrote, “Holy, Holy, Holy.” My nephew Luke loved saying “Reginald, Reginald…” over and over again.

Each hymn and story about the author is also accompanied by a Bible verse. Each “lesson” is packed with theological truths that can lead from conversation to conversation. Just this morning we talked about seraphim, what the word “holy” means and how important it is to thank God for everything.

And there is an awesome CD that accompanies the book, so we were able to listen to the hymns sung by children.

I found out there are more books in the series. I know I’ll be purchasing them for future little Castleberries.

Posted on by castleberryhearts

The Face of God

I was cleaning out the trunk of my car this morning and I found this sermon on a CD. Grant’s mom sent it to me when Grant and I were dating. Grant gave this sermon in the summer of 2004, when he was just barely 20 years old!
I listened to it this morning and smiled because I enjoyed it as much as I did the first time I heard it. I am so thankful to be married to a man who tells me so often that he just loves God’s Word so much. I am praying for God to raise up more young men who desire to be pastors and teachers of His Word. And if we are ever blessed with sons, I pray that they would have a heart and love for God’s Word.

I especially love his armadillo story 🙂

Posted on by castleberryhearts · 3 Comments

Texas Heart Part 23 {Unchartered Frontier}

“Grant, what made you think of me that day last summer when you added me as a friend on Facebook? I really want to know.” Grant and I were sitting near the water’s edge in Anchorage, Alaska. 
I had flown in the night before and had been greeted at the airport by Grant in his boots and hooded fleece jacket. It was chilly in Alaska, even in the middle of the summer.
After receiving a huge hug from Grant, I noticed he was holding a big brown paper bag.
“What’s that?” I asked as we started walking to the truck Grant was borrowing from some friends of Grant’s parents that I would be staying with during my visit.
Grant reached for my hand, smiling, and said, “Oh, it’s just a little gift I picked up for you.”
I loved it when Grant smiled like that. And of course I loved it when he took my hand. 
When we reached the truck, Grant handed me the bag, and I opened it up excitedly. I had no idea what it could be.
“I love it!” I exclaimed as I pulled out a pale blue North Face fleece jacket. I’d never owned a North Face fleece even though it seemed that almost every girl at Clemson had one. I had always wanted one, but Grant didn’t know that.
“I thought this color would look good on you and you could wear it while you’re here,” Grant explained, “Put it on.“
I pulled the warm fleece over my light cotton sweater. It fit perfectly.
“I was right, it looks really good,” Grant said as he stood there staring at me.
“Thank you, Grant. Thank you for thinking of me.”

“Of course, it’s hard not to.”
I was touched that Grant had picked out the North Face jacket for me on his own.
I’ve always thought that gifts like that are unforgettable – gifts that are a complete surprise and that you love.
“Let’s get going!” Grant said as he closed the passenger door and made his way around the truck to the driver’s seat.
We drove out of the parking garage. I was amazed at how light it was even though it was around 11pm at night.
“Wow, I can’t believe I’m in Alaska!” I said as I stared out the window and tried to take in my surroundings.
The city of Anchorage looked pretty similar to most; though I noticed tons of trucks, and the skyline all around the city was lined with snow-capped mountains.
On top of that, it just felt different. The trees looked a little taller. The air felt a little crisper and smelled a little cleaner.
And, it just felt exciting. And I felt adventurous.
Maybe some of that excitement had to do with the fact that I was sitting next to the man that I was about to marry in just two short months. 
I glanced over at Grant. He looked like a natural out here in Alaska. He was loving it.

We took a slightly longer route back to the family’s house because Grant had seen a moose earlier that day in a wooded area, and he wanted to show it to me.
Unfortunately, the moose was long gone.
“We’ll probably see it tomorrow in this area . They like to hang out here.” Grant pointed and explained as if he was an Alaskan tour guide.
Grant pulled the truck into the drive at the family’s home. Contrary to my imagination, the family didn’t live in a cabin in the wilderness, but on an Air Force base. Their house was very normal looking, and there were no animals in sight – dead or alive.
Grant walked me to the door.
“Good-night, Grant,” I said as I opened the screen door.
Grant grabbed my hand. “Wait…“
I stared into Grant’s green eyes, noticing how long his eyelashes were. Why do guys always get the long lashes? 
“I love you, GraceAnna. I can’t wait to spend the next few days with you. And I can’t wait until you are my wife.”

We stood there for a few moments, enjoying the silence around us in the dusk. It was nearing midnight, and this was the darkest that the night would get.

“Okay,” Grant broke the quiet,  “Get inside before I break one of your dad’s rules.”

The “rules” that Grant was referring to was that he had promised my dad that he wouldn’t kiss me until our wedding day. Most of the time, that was an easy rule to keep since we were usually half a world apart. 
I had asked Grant once if it bothered him that my dad had set that rule. “Are you kidding me? I love it! I want it for my daughters.” 
As I closed the screen door behind me, I thought about how wonderful it was that I had a guy who respected and honored my father . . . and me. That said so much to me about his love for me. 
It was in small instances like this, times when he could have bent the rules, that his character really shone through. 
As I watched him back the truck out of the drive, I thought about how wonderful it would be when we didn’t have to say good-bye anymore.
—————-
“So, really . . .” I asked that next day, “How did you find me? What made you think of me last summer and look me up on Facebook?”
I had spent that day on the Air Force Base with the family I was staying with. They were an awesome Christian family and I enjoyed getting to know them.  I was so touched that they had welcomed me into their home even know they didn’t know me.
Grant had picked me up that evening as soon as he had finished work for the day.
We ate dinner at a pizza joint in downtown Anchorage, and now we were sitting on a little ridge, overlooking the water, on the outskirts of the city.
It wasn’t the first time I had asked Grant the Facebook question, but every time I had asked it before, Grant’s answer was always kind of vague.
“Honestly, GraceAnna,” Grant began as he stared out at the water, “I don’t know. It’s like you just popped in my mind one day and I decided to see if you were on Facebook. When I looked you up and saw that your last name was still Broggi, I couldn’t believe it. I thought for sure you would be married by now.”

“Really?”
“Yeah, and then,” Grant continued, “After I ‘added you,’ it didn’t appear that you were dating anyone, so I thought I would say ‘hey.’ I figured if you had stayed true to the teaching of your parents, and hadn’t rebelled against them, that you must be a Godly girl.
But, I really can’t answer your question GraceAnna, I think God just put you in my mind. When I arrived in Japan with the Marine Corps, I had time to really think about things.

When I was in college, I was always just so busy. I was hanging out with people, doing the yell leader thing, and traveling. There was never a weekend or a weeknight when I didn’t have anything to do. Even my summers were packed.

But when I got to Japan, all of that changed.  Grant’s voice became serious and he shifted his gaze from the water to me. 

I was so alone. . . and lonely and I’m not a guy that likes to spend a ton of time by myself, you know me, GraceAnna. I LOVE to hang out and have a good time with people. So being alone was kind of a shock. But I think God knew I needed to experience that. 

 When I first got to Japan, I would read for hours every night. I loved that, but reading for hours every night, every day, can eventually get lonely. Dead authors, or live ones, can’t keep you real company.

But God used that time though to shape my thinking on so many things, especially marriage and family. I knew I wanted to marry not just a Godly girl, but a girl who wanted to be a wife and a mom above anything else. I wanted a girl who valued that role over a career. 

Also, I didn’t want to marry a girl who just had Jesus as one of her “interests” along with her love for Paris, shopping, and drinking coffee. I wanted a girl who was sold out for Jesus and who had a heart for ministry. 

I was so amazed as I thought about how God had been working in both of our lives, separately.

Grant’s voice became lighthearted again. “I just figured I would have to wait until I came back to the States to meet a Christian girl. I knew I wanted to have sons who are football players, so I couldn’t marry a Japanese girl,” Grant said jokingly.

 I thought I’d have to wait and meet a girl when I attended seminary. I never, ever, dreamed that I would start talking to you!”

Grant’s voice became more and more animated, the way it always does when he talks about something he’s excited about.
“GraceAnna, do you have any idea how excited I am that we are getting married!!! It was almost from the moment we started talking, I knew you were the girl of my heart.”

Now I couldn’t stop laughing at Grant’s excitement as he had jumped up from where we were sitting on the edge of the ridge and half shouted, “I am marrying GraceAnna Broggi, do you know how happy I am about that?”
Grant grabbed me and tried to start dancing with me. For some reason his conversation with me shifted to this.
“Wait, what dance is this?” I asked, laughingly. I was completely confused and stepping all over Grant’s cowboy boots.
“It’s the Texas Two Step. Here, follow my lead. It’s two steps fast, then two steps slow.”
I had expected Grant to just kind of swing me around, jokingly, but I realized that he was really dancing. I’d never in my life met a guy who could dance so well.
“How in the world are you such a good dancer?”

“I used to be on a Texas dance team in high school when I attended Lake Highlands.”
“What??? You are kidding me!”

“Yeah, they were called The Wranglers. Wait, now follow me. . .”
The Wranglers? I thought to myself while trying to keep up with Grant. “Like the jeans?” I asked. 
“Yeah, like the jeans,” Grant said laughing. “It was actually really competitive.”
Suddenly, we heard a loud whistle blow and a huge passenger train rounded the bend. I hadn’t even noticed that there was a train track just slightly below us on the side of the ridge.
The conductor gave us a nod and a wave. We stood there and watched the train until the last car disappeared into the wilderness.
to be continued…