mothering in the deep

Lately I have been thinking of a phrase Grant mentioned in his sermon a few weeks ago, God for God. Last summer, God brought us our son, Patrick. This little boy’s presence in our home has brought such joy. I cannot contain myself from documenting and enjoying and thanking God for all the moments with him!

But I don’t want to just love God for the blessings He brings, I want God for God. It can be easy to talk about God as a means to an end ~ wanting God so I can be a better wife, a more loving mom, or have more well behaved children. So much of this conversation focuses on what God does for me.

This is a shallow faith. A faith that focuses on the external and the temporal. A faith that can easily put Jesus in a tag line, as if He is the same as other loves.

I want something more than that kind of faith. I want something deeper. I want something deeper for my children.

For in the deep is where our children learn about God. It’s where they learn that they are small and God is big. In the deep they learn that there is a great Creator who made all things and holds their very life and breath.

Motherhood is not about playing in the shallow end. Godly motherhood is about going deep.

But how do we do that?

I think the only way to go deep with our children and disciple them the way we ought, is by going deep ourselves.

By loving God for God.

Because here’s the thing, we can’t take our children places we’ve never been.

Here is what I am realizing about myself: I am prone to a life of superficial shallowness and it takes intentionality for me to go deep with my children. It takes commitment and a discipline to use ordinary moments to take them deep.

And to do that, I have to be willing to go deep with God myself. But realistically, how do I do that in the chaos? How do I make that happen when there are little ones to feed, interruptions, and messes? How do I go deep with God in the mundane day-to-day?

First, and absolutely the most important thing is to be in a church where the Bible is taught every week and Christ is at the center. The church is where Christ ministers to you. It’s where you encounter the Word of God outside of yourself. It’s where you encounter Christ’s body. If you aren’t in a church like this, share with your husband your desire to be in a Christ exalting, Bible believing church. If you aren’t faithful to be in a body of believers where the Word is taught, you will dry up spiritually. A great place to start is right here. I look forward to Sunday all week. Some weeks I feel like it’s Sunday that sustains my Monday through Saturday.

Secondly, be in God’s Word daily. There’s no other way to hear from God than through His Word. This is God speaking to you. So to go deep with God, you must hear His voice. I think too often as women we let this slide because there are so many needs around us to attend to. But this is something we cannot live without. Just like you need physical food to power through your day, so you need God’s Word. I’ve had to let go of my expectations of how this time will look for me. Sometimes, I’m reading with children on my lap. Sometimes I’m reading with kids running around the house. Sometimes I’m reading in the car or listening to the Bible on audio while I get ready for the day. But whether it’s fast food or a sit down and enjoyable dinner, God has shown me how desperately I need His Word. If you don’t know where to start, this is the plan I use. I use it like a checklist and worry less about the date, and more about the fact that I am moving forward in His Word, and I am being nourished.

Third, I listen to sermons and podcasts during the week. Paul instructs us in Philippians 4:8 to set our minds on what is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, and excellent. He also says in Colossions 3:2, “Set your minds on things above.” I do my best to grab pockets of time when my children are working on an assignment, having rest time, or I’m folding laundry. My favorite thing to do is listen to a pastor expound a text that I just read in my morning Bible reading. There is so much I read that I don’t understand. I have been amazed by how the Holy Spirit has grown me through this practice! I also love listening to old Elisabeth Elliot’s broadcasts or listening to hymns to feed my soul on doctrinal truth.

Fourth, reach out to godly women for help. This is why Titus 2 is so important for us as women and as mothers. We can’t do it on our own. We desperately need older women to teach us what it looks like to swim the depths of life. We need women we can pick up the phone and call when we feel like we are drowning. We need to see what it looks like to be ALL IN with our kids in whatever season we are in. We need women in our lives who aren’t content to sit on the sidelines, but have spent years diving into the depths of God.

Fifth, prayer. Prayer is more than me making my requests known to God. Prayer is communion with God. Prayer is intimacy with God. Prayer is knowing God. To strive to be a woman of depth, but fail to be a woman of prayer, is to fail all together. The deep women of God, pray. As I grow in my walk with the Lord, prayer has become easier. I notice that I’m using more Scripture in my prayers. That when I pray, I mean it. A couple weeks ago I read the book of Jonah. Before I knew it I had prayed with my kids, “Lord, just like you caused that great fish to vomit out Jonah, will you answer this prayer?” (my kids thought that was pretty funny too). But wherever I am and whatever I am doing, there is an opportunity to go deep in my prayer life with the Lord. That the God of the universe, maker of heaven and earth would heard my prayers is truly amazing.

I want to go deep with God and I want my children to go deep with God. I want to go to places I’ve never been in my relationship with Him, and I don’t want to leave my children in the shallows. I want to take them with me. I want God for God.

Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways! Romans 11:33